Sunday, 8 February 2015

Down In The Park Part 1: A Different Face.

Just this week there was released a new trailer for Jurassic World, but also a teaser for a Lego Jurassic Park game. And the strange thing is, I find myself looking forward to these quite a bit. The problem here of course is WHY this is so strange. I mean, Lego games are generally considered to be fun times, right? And in the new movie all the dinosaurs will have an extra 300 attack points.

Unless the puny human protagonists have a Mystical Space Typhoon handy, anyway.
But whilst I have previously bitched and whined about the lack of decent Dinosaur related gaming options available, it was the list of announced features that really brought home the problem. They're making a new lego game based on Jurassic world? Okay, that could be cool. It's going to cover all 4 movies? Wait a minute......

That means there's going to be a whole section based on Jurassic Park 2.


That alone is almost enough to put me off entirely. I can only hope that they'll have put in a little lego film crew that you can stomp into oblivion once you've unlocked the T-Rex. Because the problem with Jurassic Park as a franchise, is that it DOESN'T WORK AS A FRANCHISE. Sure, the first film is really rather good. Not without it's flaws of course, but what isn't? But the sequels are BAD. Really, really BAD. Indeed, possibly the nicest thing you can say about Jurassic Park 3 is that at least it isn't Jurassic Park 2.

And of course, that's what's been really spoiling my week. Because, if we're going to have this conversation, if we're going to talk about what's wrong with the Jurassic Park franchise and why I'm hopeful about this latest sequel not actually being as bad, I'm going to have to do a review of the first three movies. And that means I'm going to have watch them again.


 And thanks to the cruel and unforgiving nature of mathematics, this will have to include part 2.


If anyone wants me, I'll be in the corner, crying.