Showing posts with label experiences. Show all posts
Showing posts with label experiences. Show all posts
Saturday, 4 July 2015
Friday, 3 July 2015
Thursday, 2 July 2015
Wednesday, 1 July 2015
Sunday, 28 June 2015
Tuesday, 23 June 2015
Sunday, 21 June 2015
Friday, 18 November 2011
But Is It Canon?
Well, yes, in manner of speaking. Several times. I have just returned from Kanon X Kanons gig at the O2 Academy. Or at least in a bit of it. I never knew that they had a super special secret extra bit hidden away. About the size of the Underworld I guess, but less grotty. It was a bit surprising to find the gig in this smaller area. It was also a surprise just how far up the queue I was when I arrived. I was expecting there to be a lot more people, but then I was also expecting it to be in the normal place. This is of course all fantastic news. You can't beat this sort of set up in my opinion. I t makes for a special sort of gig, far more intimate and friendly than you'd ever get in a big venue.
And this was certainly a special gig. Very special and rather unusual. It's not everyday an artist plays a concert as their own support band. The evening was split into 3 acts. Firstly Kanon Wakeshima played some of her own songs. Then Kanon from An Cafe came out and DJ'd for a bit. Finally Kanon X Kanon finished of the evening. As I said, kind of odd. Whilst Kanon Wakeshima has a couple of albums of her own material, Kanon X Kanon only has a couple of singles. However, since it features 2 famous musicians it does have the greater star power. And let's be honest, there's not many bands that could pull of a full European tour on the back of five songs. One of which they didn't even play. But I digress, how did it go?
First up was the delightful Miss Wakeshima herself. She was, of course, quite adorable. Having said that though, I never before realized just how bad ass playing the Cello can actually look. It's like all that fiddly guitar stuff, only writ large. I don't know why more metal bands don't employ a Cellist. Not that her music could really be described as metal. Suffice to say she started with the haunting gothic tones of Still Doll, and finished up with the ridiculously cheery bounce of Princess Charleston. Needles to say I was a happy bunny.
After this it was Mr Kanons turn, playing a selection of his favorite anime themes. I must confess that aside from a weird mix of a Kotoko song from Kannazuki No Miko there wasn't much I recognized. Although I do now have a list of new shows to check out thanks to the video projection of the various shows openings or closings. Of course he finished with an An Cafe track. But Kakusei Heroism is an awesome track, so who's going to argue?
It was after this that the REALLY strange part of the show happened. A somewhat protracted introduction to the art of Otage from 2 animated characters and a rather strange gentleman clad in a spandex grey alien costume was projected upon the screen. Otage is, apparently, an ancient japanese nerd technique of dancing incredibly badly but with great enthusiasm. This equally baffling and hilarious. And whilst it did go on a bit the purpose was quite clearly to buy time to get ready for the main event. It really can't be all that easy supporting yourself like this.
But after this rather unexpected interlude both Kanons took to the stage, resplendent in their outfits from the Calendula Requiem video. They busted out everything except Umigami Soup, which got used in part as the intro. Filling out the set were a couple of unexpected covers. Firstly A track from Sailor Moon, which I admit I only really realised when Mr Kanon jumped out dressed as Tuxedo Mask, and then a Hatsune Miko track. Which of course I only know thanks to the projector showing the leek wielding character in question. The final track was Koi No Dotei, during which Mr Kanon exemplified the previously discussed Otage dancing with terrifying gusto and a good time was had by all. They even came out and played it again for an encore. Which was both nice of them and pretty compelling evidence that they really should look at actually recording a full album soon.
As I said, a rather unusual evening. But certainly a most enjoyable one. The band were friendly and engaging, taking the time to shake hands with pretty much everyone at the front of the stage several times. What they lacked in flash and budget (there's only so much you can do with 2 people and a macbook) they made up in heart. All things considered this tour has been quite an impressive achievement.
Now, if they could just start work on that album...
And this was certainly a special gig. Very special and rather unusual. It's not everyday an artist plays a concert as their own support band. The evening was split into 3 acts. Firstly Kanon Wakeshima played some of her own songs. Then Kanon from An Cafe came out and DJ'd for a bit. Finally Kanon X Kanon finished of the evening. As I said, kind of odd. Whilst Kanon Wakeshima has a couple of albums of her own material, Kanon X Kanon only has a couple of singles. However, since it features 2 famous musicians it does have the greater star power. And let's be honest, there's not many bands that could pull of a full European tour on the back of five songs. One of which they didn't even play. But I digress, how did it go?
First up was the delightful Miss Wakeshima herself. She was, of course, quite adorable. Having said that though, I never before realized just how bad ass playing the Cello can actually look. It's like all that fiddly guitar stuff, only writ large. I don't know why more metal bands don't employ a Cellist. Not that her music could really be described as metal. Suffice to say she started with the haunting gothic tones of Still Doll, and finished up with the ridiculously cheery bounce of Princess Charleston. Needles to say I was a happy bunny.
After this it was Mr Kanons turn, playing a selection of his favorite anime themes. I must confess that aside from a weird mix of a Kotoko song from Kannazuki No Miko there wasn't much I recognized. Although I do now have a list of new shows to check out thanks to the video projection of the various shows openings or closings. Of course he finished with an An Cafe track. But Kakusei Heroism is an awesome track, so who's going to argue?
It was after this that the REALLY strange part of the show happened. A somewhat protracted introduction to the art of Otage from 2 animated characters and a rather strange gentleman clad in a spandex grey alien costume was projected upon the screen. Otage is, apparently, an ancient japanese nerd technique of dancing incredibly badly but with great enthusiasm. This equally baffling and hilarious. And whilst it did go on a bit the purpose was quite clearly to buy time to get ready for the main event. It really can't be all that easy supporting yourself like this.
But after this rather unexpected interlude both Kanons took to the stage, resplendent in their outfits from the Calendula Requiem video. They busted out everything except Umigami Soup, which got used in part as the intro. Filling out the set were a couple of unexpected covers. Firstly A track from Sailor Moon, which I admit I only really realised when Mr Kanon jumped out dressed as Tuxedo Mask, and then a Hatsune Miko track. Which of course I only know thanks to the projector showing the leek wielding character in question. The final track was Koi No Dotei, during which Mr Kanon exemplified the previously discussed Otage dancing with terrifying gusto and a good time was had by all. They even came out and played it again for an encore. Which was both nice of them and pretty compelling evidence that they really should look at actually recording a full album soon.
As I said, a rather unusual evening. But certainly a most enjoyable one. The band were friendly and engaging, taking the time to shake hands with pretty much everyone at the front of the stage several times. What they lacked in flash and budget (there's only so much you can do with 2 people and a macbook) they made up in heart. All things considered this tour has been quite an impressive achievement.
Now, if they could just start work on that album...
Monday, 11 July 2011
CONtretemps
So, I went to the London Film & Comic Con on Saturday. I'd never been to a con before, so it was an interesting new experience.
Well, that's not STRICTLY true. I have, after all, been shopping and spent far to much money before. Just not usually surrounded by quite so many nerds. There was quite a bewildering array of things on offer. I know there were talks and stuff as well, but it turned out the only one that I'd really have been interested in happened before we got in. Maybe if they'd actually bothered to list any of them on the goddamn website we could have arranged to go early. Ah well, such is life.
But the shopping! As I said, there was much. Many and various THINGS. And I didn't even get everything I wanted. There was some Yu-Gi-Oh stuff and Doctor Who minis that I was going to back for, but when the time came my mind and body were broken and I totally forgot. Which is kinda annoying. If you want a good idea of the breadth and depth of the prizes on offer, aside from the fact that we spent nearly a whole day trawling up and down the dealers aisles, allow me to demonstrate.
You see those cute Sanrio characters?
I NOW HAVE PORN OF THAT. In soviet Japan Rule 34 is Rule No. 1. And it's mandatory.
Aside from the Doujin stand and the wizards hats the other highlight of the day was, for me, getting a photo with Sylvester McCoy. Because to a child of the 80s Doctor Who fanboy like me he is unto a GOD. I'm not going to post it of course. Aside from the simple principle of putting a wretched visage such as my own online, the simple fact is that my idiot grin and rigid posture make me into the human equivalent of a massive boner. Which on sober reflection is of course entirely accurate. Even aside from being a massive cock most of the time at the moment my entire body was an erection.
Metaphorically speaking.
Anyway, as cool as that was it did sadly lead to the only major problem of the day. Which was trying to collect the damn thing. Picture if you will a thousand sweaty, exhausted and cheesed off individuals, clustered round a small table, desperately trying to collect their pictures as the clock inexorably counts down towards chucking out time and NOBODY HAS A CLUE WHAT'S GOING ON. Eventually I managed to recover mine with 10 minutes to go. Which was rather cutting things fine. To say the situation lacked organisation is rather like saying the cold void of interstellar space lacks a breathable atmosphere. I'm not convinced they were quite prepared for the Karen Gillan sessions that had completely sold out well in advance of the day thus not really providing them any reasonable excuse, but I could be wrong.
Anyway, despite the trauma of the last hour and a half or so it was actually quite a fun time out. Which baring in mind my rather fragile mental state is pretty impressive. May have to try it again some time.
Once mind, body and wallet have recovered, anyway.
Well, that's not STRICTLY true. I have, after all, been shopping and spent far to much money before. Just not usually surrounded by quite so many nerds. There was quite a bewildering array of things on offer. I know there were talks and stuff as well, but it turned out the only one that I'd really have been interested in happened before we got in. Maybe if they'd actually bothered to list any of them on the goddamn website we could have arranged to go early. Ah well, such is life.
But the shopping! As I said, there was much. Many and various THINGS. And I didn't even get everything I wanted. There was some Yu-Gi-Oh stuff and Doctor Who minis that I was going to back for, but when the time came my mind and body were broken and I totally forgot. Which is kinda annoying. If you want a good idea of the breadth and depth of the prizes on offer, aside from the fact that we spent nearly a whole day trawling up and down the dealers aisles, allow me to demonstrate.
You see those cute Sanrio characters?
I NOW HAVE PORN OF THAT. In soviet Japan Rule 34 is Rule No. 1. And it's mandatory.
Aside from the Doujin stand and the wizards hats the other highlight of the day was, for me, getting a photo with Sylvester McCoy. Because to a child of the 80s Doctor Who fanboy like me he is unto a GOD. I'm not going to post it of course. Aside from the simple principle of putting a wretched visage such as my own online, the simple fact is that my idiot grin and rigid posture make me into the human equivalent of a massive boner. Which on sober reflection is of course entirely accurate. Even aside from being a massive cock most of the time at the moment my entire body was an erection.
Metaphorically speaking.
Anyway, as cool as that was it did sadly lead to the only major problem of the day. Which was trying to collect the damn thing. Picture if you will a thousand sweaty, exhausted and cheesed off individuals, clustered round a small table, desperately trying to collect their pictures as the clock inexorably counts down towards chucking out time and NOBODY HAS A CLUE WHAT'S GOING ON. Eventually I managed to recover mine with 10 minutes to go. Which was rather cutting things fine. To say the situation lacked organisation is rather like saying the cold void of interstellar space lacks a breathable atmosphere. I'm not convinced they were quite prepared for the Karen Gillan sessions that had completely sold out well in advance of the day thus not really providing them any reasonable excuse, but I could be wrong.
Anyway, despite the trauma of the last hour and a half or so it was actually quite a fun time out. Which baring in mind my rather fragile mental state is pretty impressive. May have to try it again some time.
Once mind, body and wallet have recovered, anyway.
Friday, 1 April 2011
Are You Experienced?
So then, I've just got back from the Doctor Who Experience. Well, not quite just. I had a kebab and watched The Eleventh Hour first. But that's not the point. The point is that I finally went to check it out, so now I can tell you about it.
Whilst it's not a complete pain to get to, it is worth noting that it seems to be based near some sort of college or something, and thus to approach it we were forced to wade through legions of students.
Quite why they were coating the streets like a human slime mold and not off studying something (or better yet GETTING JOBS) is not something I'm really sure of, and in any case is rather outside the scope of this article.
Once free of the yattering horde we finally approached the building proper, which I must admit seemed a bit... odd. I mean, it's like an office building or something. You go in, and are directed upstairs. And in the lift there is a dedicated hapless drone to push the buttons for you.
Seriously. There were actual lift attendants. I was FREAKING OUT. Clearly this area is far too posh for the likes of me.
Well, apart from the students.
Anyway, what of the actual show?
Well, we go in and buy are tickets which then allow us access to a sort of holding area before the interactive portion. There are a few exhibits from the new series, but basically this is for a queuing system in between groups. I would imagine that it gets quite busy on the weekends, but then that's why we came on a Friday. After a bit of waiting around we are then let in to the actual experience. And I have to say that the whole thing was simply FANTASTIC.
Obviously, this bit may contain some SPOILERS.
So, after a short video presentation we are led through a crack in time into a museum vault on the Starship UK.
You heard me.
The level of detail in this room is awesome. There's all kinds of stuff scattered around to spot, and whilst a couple of things are highlighted, there's plenty more to look for. I mean, screens from Magpie Electricals, a Clockwork Droid head, the sign from the pub from The Daemons... All kinds of awesome hidden away. I didn't even notice until I was looking through the pictures in the program afterwards that one of the Ranis' T-Rex foetuses was sitting on a shelf. Great stuff.
After a short presentation we receive a transmission from the Doctor, and the the TARDIS materialises and we all go aboard.
You heard me.
We lurch through time and space a little, before materialising on Dalek saucer. In the middle of a Dalek civil war.
You heard me.
After narrowly avoiding extermination we dash down a time corridor, through a ruined landscape of Weeping Angels, and into, strangely enough, a 3D cinema for the finale. Now I've gone on record about not being particularly enthused with the whole 3D thing before, but I have to say that this was pretty good. The 3D effects were actually well realized, giving an actual sense of depth and reach, and it was short enough that it didn't completely do my head in or make my eyes bleed.
To say that I proceeded through these various stages with a giant shit eating grin is, in all fairness, fairly accurate. I mean, seriously, how cool was all that? I can only imagine what it's like to be a 12 year old boy seeing that.
Lower down I would guess.
But seriously, awesome stuff. Kids don't know how lucky they are with all this.
After all that excitement we THEN get out into the exhibition area. Now, I must confess that in the grand scale of Doctor Who exhibitions this wasn't the largest or widest ranging collection. But the I HAVE been to most of the shows in the past few years. What we have here is, however, a bloody good display of a wide ranging history of the show. There's modern stuff, there's older stuff. Some replicas, some restored, some original. And this is a first. Previously we've had shows from all new series stuff, and before it closed there was the museum in Blackpool which had a all classic stuff. But never have they been presented as one before. So we have modern Cybermen along with a display of Cyber heads from history. Or a timeline of Daleks from the Dead Planet all the way up to the new paradigm behemoths. Ood, Hath, Ice Warriors, Zygons and a full spectrum of Sontarans.
Notable by their absence were the Hoix and a Vashta Nerada suit. Out for repair? or out for something else? Only time will tell, but why let that get in the way of a good rumor?
An interesting diversion in here is the green screen photo stand, where you can buy photographs of yourself badly photoshopped into a limited choice of backgrounds. Whilst I didn't really rate most of them, the Pandorica interior one was actually pretty good. Though mostly that's because you got to sit in a replica of the chair from the Pandorica. No doubt if I was bale to have a facebook this would be added to my profile. I would put it up here, but it's got me in it. So just be grateful I'm sparing you that particular misfortune.
After the exhibition there is then, off course, the little shop. Personally I wasn't as impressed by this as I would have liked. Whilst the offerings were okay the selection and pricing wasn't particularly breathtaking. Although that may just be that nowhere ever seems to have Dalek Sec figures these days, and that's the main one I'm after.
But that's neither here nor there. The point is that this is a great exhibition. The whole interactive experience idea stands out and really makes it, with the exhibition like the icing on the top. If icing was made of TARDISes and wobots (yes, WOBOT).
Would I go again? Hell yeah. I'm going to. The only question is when. After all, it's been said that the exhibits will be updated with the new series. So come the mid season break I'd imagine there'll be all manner of interesting new things to see.
If you're a fan of Doctor Who you should undoubtedly go. And if you're not a fan of Doctor Who you should undoubtedly sort your life out as there's something wrong with you.
Whilst it's not a complete pain to get to, it is worth noting that it seems to be based near some sort of college or something, and thus to approach it we were forced to wade through legions of students.
Like this, only far less entertaining.
Quite why they were coating the streets like a human slime mold and not off studying something (or better yet GETTING JOBS) is not something I'm really sure of, and in any case is rather outside the scope of this article.
Once free of the yattering horde we finally approached the building proper, which I must admit seemed a bit... odd. I mean, it's like an office building or something. You go in, and are directed upstairs. And in the lift there is a dedicated hapless drone to push the buttons for you.
Seriously. There were actual lift attendants. I was FREAKING OUT. Clearly this area is far too posh for the likes of me.
Well, apart from the students.
Anyway, what of the actual show?
Well, we go in and buy are tickets which then allow us access to a sort of holding area before the interactive portion. There are a few exhibits from the new series, but basically this is for a queuing system in between groups. I would imagine that it gets quite busy on the weekends, but then that's why we came on a Friday. After a bit of waiting around we are then let in to the actual experience. And I have to say that the whole thing was simply FANTASTIC.
Obviously, this bit may contain some SPOILERS.
So, after a short video presentation we are led through a crack in time into a museum vault on the Starship UK.
You heard me.
The level of detail in this room is awesome. There's all kinds of stuff scattered around to spot, and whilst a couple of things are highlighted, there's plenty more to look for. I mean, screens from Magpie Electricals, a Clockwork Droid head, the sign from the pub from The Daemons... All kinds of awesome hidden away. I didn't even notice until I was looking through the pictures in the program afterwards that one of the Ranis' T-Rex foetuses was sitting on a shelf. Great stuff.
After a short presentation we receive a transmission from the Doctor, and the the TARDIS materialises and we all go aboard.
You heard me.
We lurch through time and space a little, before materialising on Dalek saucer. In the middle of a Dalek civil war.
You heard me.
After narrowly avoiding extermination we dash down a time corridor, through a ruined landscape of Weeping Angels, and into, strangely enough, a 3D cinema for the finale. Now I've gone on record about not being particularly enthused with the whole 3D thing before, but I have to say that this was pretty good. The 3D effects were actually well realized, giving an actual sense of depth and reach, and it was short enough that it didn't completely do my head in or make my eyes bleed.
To say that I proceeded through these various stages with a giant shit eating grin is, in all fairness, fairly accurate. I mean, seriously, how cool was all that? I can only imagine what it's like to be a 12 year old boy seeing that.
Lower down I would guess.
But seriously, awesome stuff. Kids don't know how lucky they are with all this.
After all that excitement we THEN get out into the exhibition area. Now, I must confess that in the grand scale of Doctor Who exhibitions this wasn't the largest or widest ranging collection. But the I HAVE been to most of the shows in the past few years. What we have here is, however, a bloody good display of a wide ranging history of the show. There's modern stuff, there's older stuff. Some replicas, some restored, some original. And this is a first. Previously we've had shows from all new series stuff, and before it closed there was the museum in Blackpool which had a all classic stuff. But never have they been presented as one before. So we have modern Cybermen along with a display of Cyber heads from history. Or a timeline of Daleks from the Dead Planet all the way up to the new paradigm behemoths. Ood, Hath, Ice Warriors, Zygons and a full spectrum of Sontarans.
Notable by their absence were the Hoix and a Vashta Nerada suit. Out for repair? or out for something else? Only time will tell, but why let that get in the way of a good rumor?
An interesting diversion in here is the green screen photo stand, where you can buy photographs of yourself badly photoshopped into a limited choice of backgrounds. Whilst I didn't really rate most of them, the Pandorica interior one was actually pretty good. Though mostly that's because you got to sit in a replica of the chair from the Pandorica. No doubt if I was bale to have a facebook this would be added to my profile. I would put it up here, but it's got me in it. So just be grateful I'm sparing you that particular misfortune.
After the exhibition there is then, off course, the little shop. Personally I wasn't as impressed by this as I would have liked. Whilst the offerings were okay the selection and pricing wasn't particularly breathtaking. Although that may just be that nowhere ever seems to have Dalek Sec figures these days, and that's the main one I'm after.
Really, is it so much to ask?
But that's neither here nor there. The point is that this is a great exhibition. The whole interactive experience idea stands out and really makes it, with the exhibition like the icing on the top. If icing was made of TARDISes and wobots (yes, WOBOT).
Would I go again? Hell yeah. I'm going to. The only question is when. After all, it's been said that the exhibits will be updated with the new series. So come the mid season break I'd imagine there'll be all manner of interesting new things to see.
If you're a fan of Doctor Who you should undoubtedly go. And if you're not a fan of Doctor Who you should undoubtedly sort your life out as there's something wrong with you.
Saturday, 9 October 2010
It's A Great Day To Be An 8 Year Old
Man I was ill today. I mean, I'd been plagued with this horrible cough for weeks (whatever happened to that nice cough you used to have?) but it wasn't really going anywhere. But then just last night, bam! It kicks in with a vengeance, Because tonight was the first night of Doctor Who Live. So you see, whether it's just a cold, Lazeres Disease or even Spectrox Toxaemia, I'm not going to let you stop me now!
Anyway, loaded up on drugs and industrial strength cough syrup I wend my merry way up to Wembley Arena for the start of the festivities. After a long wait for the doors to open we get let in to peruse the overpriced crap. Some may call it unfair to label the merchandise thus. But when you can purchase for a price no less than EIGHT earth pounds a Cyberman mask that differs only from one cut out from the back of a packet of breakfast cereal in thickness of the material it is printed on I feel quite justified. Not that that stopped me getting a t shirt and program. Anyway, still further waiting around aimlessly is mandated before they actually let us anywhere near the seats. Perhaps so we don't have time to run away and ask for a refund. The seating is..... Not great. Small, cramped and far from the most padded or comfortable things I've ever sat on. There are also issues with the elevation of the rows. Namely there barely is any. Now, including the line "Fuck you, short people" in your customer service statement is interesting at the best of times. But when you're holding a show in which half the audience is liable to children?
Somebody somewhere is missing the point. I'm just saying that if you're paying forty quid for a seat you'd expect something a little less obviously cheap.
Now, before I discuss the actual show I'd like to address a couple of issues. Firstly SIT THE FUCK DOWN. Seriously. I know the view is not great. I know that when the monsters are wandering up the aisles they can be difficult to see. But you've just ensured that NO ONE behind you can see either whats going on in aisles, nor indeed on the stage. Including the giant screen where the video feeds of the wandering monsters are projected. So thanks for that. Secondly, this is a pretty big arena. Your shitty camera phone is not going to get a single shot worth a damn. Put the camera away, SIT THE FUCK DOWN and watch the show. If you want a souvenir buy a goddamn T-Shirt like everyone else.
The show itself is, of course, well wicked. Essentially what we have here is a natural outgrowth of the proms performances. Some spiel from the stage, some music, some video montages and Monsters wandering about the audience. Only now we have a plot to go with the spectacle. And it's the plot of Carnival Of Monsters. The only thing missing is the Drashigs killing everyone for an encore, which does come as slight disappointment I admit.
So yeah, there's enough sly references to the classics to keep any fanboy happy. It certainly worked for me. And so the show goes on. Not operating with a full orchestra we get some rather interesting rock based arrangements of various pieces from the soundtrack, which work amazingly well. Seriously, if these versions don't see some sort of release it would be a crime and I may be forced to unleash the Myrka in retribution.
Speaking of the Myrka, at first glance the roster of monsters on offer may seem a little... odd. I mean yeah, there's Daleks and Cybermen and even Ood. But Smilers? Scarecrows? Hardly the classicest ones to break out. But it's worth noting that cost and practicality are the keys here. It's be awesome to have the Sontarans for example. However the Saturnyne Vampire girls are cheap, simple and perhaps most important a quick costume change. I don't begrudge them a focus on the new series at all, and the show they've put together is great. I am however greedy. And thus want MORE.
Anyway some highlights: Obviously Cybermen stomping around the place is inveterately cool. Cybermen giving the "you belong to us...." bit is massively cool. Cybermen pulling a (planted) guy out of the audience and upgrading him then and there is, however, priceless. As is having a pair of Weeping Angels show up and kill a whole load of police using nothing more than creative lighting and misdirection. Truly wicked..
Then of course there's the Daleks.
Now, whether or not you're particularly enamoured of the new design you simply cannt deny just how exciting it was seeing them trundle out onto the stage. I mean you have the awesome metalled up version of the music and a DALEK RIGHT THERE ON STAGE!!! And THEN there's MORE Daleks!!! We get Dalek vision camera feeds on the screen!! And then they have a fight with the Cybermen!!! And it works a hell of a lot better than in Doomsday which despite it's merits is, essentially, overblown fanwank.
Anyway, we get some really clever projection integrating the ore filmed segments with Matt Smith, going from transmitting to the main screen to being trapped in a box on one side of the stage. It's a really creative way of getting around not actually having him as part of the show.
And yeah, in the finale there is, as promised, a flying Dalek. And yeah, it's impressive. I'm not entirely sure how they managed it. You can see the underside so it doesn't seem to be on a lift. And the way it moves doesn't look like wires. And a Dalek is hardly the lightest thing in the world. Some cunning combination of techniques no doubt. Anyway, you will believe a Dalek can fly.
Anyway, theres only one major thing left to mention, and that's Vorgensson himself. Intergalactic showman and the binding glue of the whole show. The performance given is suitably theatrical (if perhaps not strictly kosher) and quite in suiting to the ongoing rigmarole. Channeling the spirit of Henry Gordon Jago as well as the great Vorg himself he makes for an enjoyable neer do well host. Almost hard to believe he was once Neil in the Young Ones. Still, I guess that's what they call acting.
So, overall we have some great music, cool monsters, fun performances and a big grin on the heart of every true Doctor Who fan. A great success overall I'd say. One can only wonder whether or not the camera data is being saved and we'll get some form of dvd release in the future. It'd certainly make for a great inclusion in the next boxset.
Anyway, I left in high spirits. Even feeling a sense of hope for the future of humanity after witnessing all the boys and girls running around with sonic screwdrivers.
So of course british rail decided to spoil it by turning off half the trains just as thousands of people are exiting the arena and converging on the station. This is the sort of logic that is so unlogic it actually eats other logic and then shits out ducks or something. I dunno. You'd have to be either evil or insane to think that was a good idea. And either way you will never be popular.
But fuck those guys. That was a damn good night out despite everything, and I would heartily recommend it. Just make sure you've got an aisle seat, are as far down the front as possible, and shoot whoever is in the row in front.
If any ladies in the audience think they may have Spectrox Toxemia I'm quite willing to provide the milk of my queen bat. IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
Anyway, loaded up on drugs and industrial strength cough syrup I wend my merry way up to Wembley Arena for the start of the festivities. After a long wait for the doors to open we get let in to peruse the overpriced crap. Some may call it unfair to label the merchandise thus. But when you can purchase for a price no less than EIGHT earth pounds a Cyberman mask that differs only from one cut out from the back of a packet of breakfast cereal in thickness of the material it is printed on I feel quite justified. Not that that stopped me getting a t shirt and program. Anyway, still further waiting around aimlessly is mandated before they actually let us anywhere near the seats. Perhaps so we don't have time to run away and ask for a refund. The seating is..... Not great. Small, cramped and far from the most padded or comfortable things I've ever sat on. There are also issues with the elevation of the rows. Namely there barely is any. Now, including the line "Fuck you, short people" in your customer service statement is interesting at the best of times. But when you're holding a show in which half the audience is liable to children?
Somebody somewhere is missing the point. I'm just saying that if you're paying forty quid for a seat you'd expect something a little less obviously cheap.
Now, before I discuss the actual show I'd like to address a couple of issues. Firstly SIT THE FUCK DOWN. Seriously. I know the view is not great. I know that when the monsters are wandering up the aisles they can be difficult to see. But you've just ensured that NO ONE behind you can see either whats going on in aisles, nor indeed on the stage. Including the giant screen where the video feeds of the wandering monsters are projected. So thanks for that. Secondly, this is a pretty big arena. Your shitty camera phone is not going to get a single shot worth a damn. Put the camera away, SIT THE FUCK DOWN and watch the show. If you want a souvenir buy a goddamn T-Shirt like everyone else.
The show itself is, of course, well wicked. Essentially what we have here is a natural outgrowth of the proms performances. Some spiel from the stage, some music, some video montages and Monsters wandering about the audience. Only now we have a plot to go with the spectacle. And it's the plot of Carnival Of Monsters. The only thing missing is the Drashigs killing everyone for an encore, which does come as slight disappointment I admit.
And for my next trick: YOU'RE ALL GOING TO DIE.
So yeah, there's enough sly references to the classics to keep any fanboy happy. It certainly worked for me. And so the show goes on. Not operating with a full orchestra we get some rather interesting rock based arrangements of various pieces from the soundtrack, which work amazingly well. Seriously, if these versions don't see some sort of release it would be a crime and I may be forced to unleash the Myrka in retribution.
You WILL fear his wrath.
Speaking of the Myrka, at first glance the roster of monsters on offer may seem a little... odd. I mean yeah, there's Daleks and Cybermen and even Ood. But Smilers? Scarecrows? Hardly the classicest ones to break out. But it's worth noting that cost and practicality are the keys here. It's be awesome to have the Sontarans for example. However the Saturnyne Vampire girls are cheap, simple and perhaps most important a quick costume change. I don't begrudge them a focus on the new series at all, and the show they've put together is great. I am however greedy. And thus want MORE.
Anyway some highlights: Obviously Cybermen stomping around the place is inveterately cool. Cybermen giving the "you belong to us...." bit is massively cool. Cybermen pulling a (planted) guy out of the audience and upgrading him then and there is, however, priceless. As is having a pair of Weeping Angels show up and kill a whole load of police using nothing more than creative lighting and misdirection. Truly wicked..
Then of course there's the Daleks.
DUN DUN DUNNNN!!!!!
Now, whether or not you're particularly enamoured of the new design you simply cannt deny just how exciting it was seeing them trundle out onto the stage. I mean you have the awesome metalled up version of the music and a DALEK RIGHT THERE ON STAGE!!! And THEN there's MORE Daleks!!! We get Dalek vision camera feeds on the screen!! And then they have a fight with the Cybermen!!! And it works a hell of a lot better than in Doomsday which despite it's merits is, essentially, overblown fanwank.
Anyway, we get some really clever projection integrating the ore filmed segments with Matt Smith, going from transmitting to the main screen to being trapped in a box on one side of the stage. It's a really creative way of getting around not actually having him as part of the show.
And yeah, in the finale there is, as promised, a flying Dalek. And yeah, it's impressive. I'm not entirely sure how they managed it. You can see the underside so it doesn't seem to be on a lift. And the way it moves doesn't look like wires. And a Dalek is hardly the lightest thing in the world. Some cunning combination of techniques no doubt. Anyway, you will believe a Dalek can fly.
Anyway, theres only one major thing left to mention, and that's Vorgensson himself. Intergalactic showman and the binding glue of the whole show. The performance given is suitably theatrical (if perhaps not strictly kosher) and quite in suiting to the ongoing rigmarole. Channeling the spirit of Henry Gordon Jago as well as the great Vorg himself he makes for an enjoyable neer do well host. Almost hard to believe he was once Neil in the Young Ones. Still, I guess that's what they call acting.
So, overall we have some great music, cool monsters, fun performances and a big grin on the heart of every true Doctor Who fan. A great success overall I'd say. One can only wonder whether or not the camera data is being saved and we'll get some form of dvd release in the future. It'd certainly make for a great inclusion in the next boxset.
Anyway, I left in high spirits. Even feeling a sense of hope for the future of humanity after witnessing all the boys and girls running around with sonic screwdrivers.
So of course british rail decided to spoil it by turning off half the trains just as thousands of people are exiting the arena and converging on the station. This is the sort of logic that is so unlogic it actually eats other logic and then shits out ducks or something. I dunno. You'd have to be either evil or insane to think that was a good idea. And either way you will never be popular.
But fuck those guys. That was a damn good night out despite everything, and I would heartily recommend it. Just make sure you've got an aisle seat, are as far down the front as possible, and shoot whoever is in the row in front.
Thursday, 1 July 2010
We Are Not French
Well, how was that for a homosexual agenda?
Last night we went to see Versailles. I don't mean the place in france, or whoever it was that meant the real band had to append -Philharmonic Quintet- to their international releases. I mean the REAL Versailles. You know, the ones from Castlevania.
It was a supremely good show, though not without it's annoyances. The first for me being purely personal in that I didn't manage to spot P-Chan anywhere. However I'm probably not even legally allowed to actually know here. Frankly I was probably pushing my luck just being in the same room as that many teenage girls. There was, of course, the usual hassle with the opening of the doors and the letting in of us screaming hordes, however I guess the tardiness of the entry was offset by all the worrying fiddling that went on prior to the band finally taking the stage, so I doubt anyone missed anything.
And it's that worrying fiddling that will come back to haunt us I'm afraid. The light go down, the dramatic music starts and the band take to the stage, resplendent in their finery. They look, of course, gorgeous. Why is it that I can't find anywhere that sells clothes like that. And even if I could, why couldn't I afford them? Woe is me.
Anyway, I digress. They launch into God Palace as the first song and I'm all like "SQUEE" since aside from being an awesome song I was thinking that it would be really cool if they played that as an opener. And you think that's great I actually predicted the encore songs as well. Of course, I have no proof of this, but it's pretty awesome when you think to yourself "hmmm, probably they'll play The Red Carpet Day and/or The Revenant Choir" AND THEN THEY DO EXACTLY THAT. As I said; fucking SQUEE, bitches.
The entire set is, it has to be said, awesome as fuck. I don't think there was any song that I wished they played but they didn't. Loud and heavy and spot on in their performance, Versailles proved themselves to be a brilliant live band. It's almost a cliche when it comes to the Japanese bands I've seen, but only were they thoroughly engaging they were also clearly chuffed to be here. And really, what is it about Japanese people trying to speak english that is so goddamn ADORABLE?
However whilst the band were giving their all on stage to make this a great concert, someone else was off stage trying to ruin it.
No, it's not the Mecha Robos of the Iron Alliance.
It was the sound man.
I'd call the sound quality variable, except that doesn't contain the words shitty and frustrating. A whole range of problems cropped up over the course of the concert, one after the other. Bass frequencies peaking alarmingly, then one of the guitars dropping out almost completely, then it came back only to loud whilst the vocals suddenly shot down... In the end it was more like flies on your cake than shitting in your mouth, but the point still remains.
Now there's one other point that needs addressing. Whilst I wouldn't say it was exactly oppresively hot in there or anything it was certainly warm enough that most people leaving could be classified as a sweaty abomination. I certainly was. But heres the thing, and I didn't even realize until S-San pointed out to me on the train home, the band didn't appear to sweat at all. They're up there at the front, under all the light and the collective head of a thousand furiously bopping teenagers in some of the most fantastically overblown gothic outfits this side of Symphony Of The Night, and they look perfectly fine.
HOW? How do they do that? I've seen plenty of bands stumbling off that stage dripping wrecks. Are they Autons or something? In which case why didn't they shoot the goddamn sound guy?
Maybe they're actually vampires? It's possible. I mean, I've seen pictures of them in daylight and they didn't sparkle or anything.
Last night we went to see Versailles. I don't mean the place in france, or whoever it was that meant the real band had to append -Philharmonic Quintet- to their international releases. I mean the REAL Versailles. You know, the ones from Castlevania.
"Tonight we ride for Draculas castle!"
It was a supremely good show, though not without it's annoyances. The first for me being purely personal in that I didn't manage to spot P-Chan anywhere. However I'm probably not even legally allowed to actually know here. Frankly I was probably pushing my luck just being in the same room as that many teenage girls. There was, of course, the usual hassle with the opening of the doors and the letting in of us screaming hordes, however I guess the tardiness of the entry was offset by all the worrying fiddling that went on prior to the band finally taking the stage, so I doubt anyone missed anything.
And it's that worrying fiddling that will come back to haunt us I'm afraid. The light go down, the dramatic music starts and the band take to the stage, resplendent in their finery. They look, of course, gorgeous. Why is it that I can't find anywhere that sells clothes like that. And even if I could, why couldn't I afford them? Woe is me.
Anyway, I digress. They launch into God Palace as the first song and I'm all like "SQUEE" since aside from being an awesome song I was thinking that it would be really cool if they played that as an opener. And you think that's great I actually predicted the encore songs as well. Of course, I have no proof of this, but it's pretty awesome when you think to yourself "hmmm, probably they'll play The Red Carpet Day and/or The Revenant Choir" AND THEN THEY DO EXACTLY THAT. As I said; fucking SQUEE, bitches.
The entire set is, it has to be said, awesome as fuck. I don't think there was any song that I wished they played but they didn't. Loud and heavy and spot on in their performance, Versailles proved themselves to be a brilliant live band. It's almost a cliche when it comes to the Japanese bands I've seen, but only were they thoroughly engaging they were also clearly chuffed to be here. And really, what is it about Japanese people trying to speak english that is so goddamn ADORABLE?
However whilst the band were giving their all on stage to make this a great concert, someone else was off stage trying to ruin it.
No, it's not the Mecha Robos of the Iron Alliance.
Hates freedom
It was the sound man.
I'd call the sound quality variable, except that doesn't contain the words shitty and frustrating. A whole range of problems cropped up over the course of the concert, one after the other. Bass frequencies peaking alarmingly, then one of the guitars dropping out almost completely, then it came back only to loud whilst the vocals suddenly shot down... In the end it was more like flies on your cake than shitting in your mouth, but the point still remains.
Now there's one other point that needs addressing. Whilst I wouldn't say it was exactly oppresively hot in there or anything it was certainly warm enough that most people leaving could be classified as a sweaty abomination. I certainly was. But heres the thing, and I didn't even realize until S-San pointed out to me on the train home, the band didn't appear to sweat at all. They're up there at the front, under all the light and the collective head of a thousand furiously bopping teenagers in some of the most fantastically overblown gothic outfits this side of Symphony Of The Night, and they look perfectly fine.
I If only more gigs looked like this
HOW? How do they do that? I've seen plenty of bands stumbling off that stage dripping wrecks. Are they Autons or something? In which case why didn't they shoot the goddamn sound guy?
Maybe they're actually vampires? It's possible. I mean, I've seen pictures of them in daylight and they didn't sparkle or anything.
Wednesday, 16 June 2010
Perchance To Dream
I am currently in some considerable physical pain, having just been out to watch a film. This is of course not a normal response to the cinematic medium, unless of course we're talking about micheal bay (thrice cursed be his name and all his descendants). I'm both pleased and relieved to state that my current discomfort derives not from the film itself, but from the rigours required to achieve it's viewing. Many would question this as well. After all, surely the logical course of action when going to see a film would be something along the lines of "go to cinema, watch movie". But this simplistic assesment betrays their appalling taste in film. Put simply, the chances of the local flea pit showing something worthwhile are so slim as to be laughable.
No, if we're going to be watching something we're going to want to watch something good. And that means getting up to bloody london. And that means gettting to the bloody train station. And since the weather was tolerable and I'm fat I decided to WALK down to the station. It's only about 3 and half miles according to google maps, and I can do it under the hour they reckon, so go me. Give me a gold medal and a hip replacement, somethings not working properly.
Of course, in order to even get that far first I have to actually convince myself to go out at all, which really isn't as easy it may sound to many. After all, I can have a really bad time being lonely and miserable at home, for a fraction of the cost. Why go to all that expense? So, as you can see I really do need to get out more. Anyway, sticking my metaphorical fingers up at both mind and body I set out to see King Of Thorn.
King Of Thorn is a manga I've had my eye for a while, it having somehow cropped up in my amazon reccomendations. It sounded interesting, but I hadn't yet got around to buying it in. So when I found out there was a showing of the anime my curiosity was natuarally piqued. For a start, what bloody anime? According to the programme it's only come out this year. This explains why it's not on amazon yet and thus why I had to trudge umpteen miles up to bloody london to see it.
Of course in addition to being interested in the manga and needing time out of the house there is also the fact that this has my type written all over it:
So really there was no excuse to miss this. Outside of my crippling mental problems. But fuck those guys.
The plot concerns a group of people who are put into suspended animation as a hideous plague known as the medusa virus is ravaging the world. If you wonder why they call it that then go look up a few things and catch up with the rest of the class later. After an unknown period of time the survivors awaken. Only everythings completely fucked and this hideous monsters. Good luck with that guys, off you go.
I'm not going to go into much more detail than that, as you can't really without spoiling stuff. The plot makes a kind of sense and manages to remain fairly consistant throughout. There are some interesting twists to the story, but nothing that isn't entirely unexpected. Everything is set up beforehand, which does make the prospect of the manga quite intriguing. After all, if the film is following the mangas plot quite closely then there must have been a fair amount of planning ahead from basically day one. Obviously I'm somewhat spoiled as to the major plot developments now, but I'm still interested in picking up the original to see if certain themes and characters get a bit more fleshed out.
The animation style is generally pretty good, with a few interesting choices in the use of cgi. My first impression being (honestly) "do those turbine REALLY need to be cg?". That they seem to use cgi on the monsters does make for an interesting look, emphasising as it does the unnatural aspect of the beasties. A little odd, but not overly offputting. The designs of the various monsters, characters and the like all seem pretty good, but of course the real test is how they compare to the original source material. Which is not something I'm able to do yet.
One of the things highlighted in the talk beforehand was that whilst the books and the film were succesful, they weren't exactly on the crazy popularity tier of some of the big name stuff. And as much as I hate to say it I don't think it will. It's a good, solid film certainly. But it's also more the sort of thing you'll be watching if you're already into anime. More a sort of B rank the A+ of the blockbuster stuff. Which frankly suits me down to the ground. We can forget about the hype and rabid fanbases and just appreciate the work on it's own merits. It's an engaging story with some fairly tight plotting and fun characters. It's fairly original both in the basic set up and some of the design elements, and although things may seem a bit muddled at the end it's at no point dissapointing.
Most certainly I enjoyed it, and I don't feel like it was a waste of time or money going through the effort to actually watch it. In fact the only dissapointing thing is just howdifficult it is getting to see it, seeing as how it was only playing for one night and probably won't be out on DVD for a long while yet.
Still, one watch out for when it finally does gain some degree of availability.
No, if we're going to be watching something we're going to want to watch something good. And that means getting up to bloody london. And that means gettting to the bloody train station. And since the weather was tolerable and I'm fat I decided to WALK down to the station. It's only about 3 and half miles according to google maps, and I can do it under the hour they reckon, so go me. Give me a gold medal and a hip replacement, somethings not working properly.
Of course, in order to even get that far first I have to actually convince myself to go out at all, which really isn't as easy it may sound to many. After all, I can have a really bad time being lonely and miserable at home, for a fraction of the cost. Why go to all that expense? So, as you can see I really do need to get out more. Anyway, sticking my metaphorical fingers up at both mind and body I set out to see King Of Thorn.
King Of Thorn is a manga I've had my eye for a while, it having somehow cropped up in my amazon reccomendations. It sounded interesting, but I hadn't yet got around to buying it in. So when I found out there was a showing of the anime my curiosity was natuarally piqued. For a start, what bloody anime? According to the programme it's only come out this year. This explains why it's not on amazon yet and thus why I had to trudge umpteen miles up to bloody london to see it.
Of course in addition to being interested in the manga and needing time out of the house there is also the fact that this has my type written all over it:
So really there was no excuse to miss this. Outside of my crippling mental problems. But fuck those guys.
The plot concerns a group of people who are put into suspended animation as a hideous plague known as the medusa virus is ravaging the world. If you wonder why they call it that then go look up a few things and catch up with the rest of the class later. After an unknown period of time the survivors awaken. Only everythings completely fucked and this hideous monsters. Good luck with that guys, off you go.
I'm not going to go into much more detail than that, as you can't really without spoiling stuff. The plot makes a kind of sense and manages to remain fairly consistant throughout. There are some interesting twists to the story, but nothing that isn't entirely unexpected. Everything is set up beforehand, which does make the prospect of the manga quite intriguing. After all, if the film is following the mangas plot quite closely then there must have been a fair amount of planning ahead from basically day one. Obviously I'm somewhat spoiled as to the major plot developments now, but I'm still interested in picking up the original to see if certain themes and characters get a bit more fleshed out.
The animation style is generally pretty good, with a few interesting choices in the use of cgi. My first impression being (honestly) "do those turbine REALLY need to be cg?". That they seem to use cgi on the monsters does make for an interesting look, emphasising as it does the unnatural aspect of the beasties. A little odd, but not overly offputting. The designs of the various monsters, characters and the like all seem pretty good, but of course the real test is how they compare to the original source material. Which is not something I'm able to do yet.
One of the things highlighted in the talk beforehand was that whilst the books and the film were succesful, they weren't exactly on the crazy popularity tier of some of the big name stuff. And as much as I hate to say it I don't think it will. It's a good, solid film certainly. But it's also more the sort of thing you'll be watching if you're already into anime. More a sort of B rank the A+ of the blockbuster stuff. Which frankly suits me down to the ground. We can forget about the hype and rabid fanbases and just appreciate the work on it's own merits. It's an engaging story with some fairly tight plotting and fun characters. It's fairly original both in the basic set up and some of the design elements, and although things may seem a bit muddled at the end it's at no point dissapointing.
Most certainly I enjoyed it, and I don't feel like it was a waste of time or money going through the effort to actually watch it. In fact the only dissapointing thing is just howdifficult it is getting to see it, seeing as how it was only playing for one night and probably won't be out on DVD for a long while yet.
Still, one watch out for when it finally does gain some degree of availability.
Sunday, 28 March 2010
A Fete Worse Than Death?
We went to The Great Exhibition last night. This statement alone of course requires some clarification. By "We" I refer to myself of course, but also B-San and S-San. By "Exhibition" I mean a Steampunk themed evening of various entertainments and by "Great" I mean yeah, that was pretty cool.
If you want a working definition of Steampunk I shall offer only this insight from B-San: "It's goth, but without the dickheads".
So, what was happening? Well there were various acts and bands perfoming on stage, a variety of interesting and expensive goods were on sale or display, and all about were a variety of interestingly attired individuals. Obviously there were a lot of goggles wandering around, but the attire ranged from the expected pseudo victoriana through to 40's and 50's and beyond. So just looking at the crowd was interesting enough.
The acts on offer gave a fair variety of entertainments. Obviously some were better than others, depending on your tastes. For example we had an interesting chap called Bruce Airhead who climed inside a balloon in a suprisingly interesting way, and Voltini, who aside from being made of raw SCIENCE! actually shoved an electrode right up his arse. That might not sound particularly enticing, but then he did light a peanut butter sandwich on fire using an electric woman.
I guess I'm saying that you really had to be there.
Despite arriving somewhat later than intended, and leaving somewhat earlier a good time was had by all. But then we had V.I.P. tickets, and were thus inherently special. If no other reason than we didn't have to engage in the standard melee to reach the bar with the rest of the proles. Shockingly however there was a distinct lack of tea on offer, which was a little dissapointing.
Especially when you consider the whole thing was MC'd by this guy:
If you want a working definition of Steampunk I shall offer only this insight from B-San: "It's goth, but without the dickheads".
So, what was happening? Well there were various acts and bands perfoming on stage, a variety of interesting and expensive goods were on sale or display, and all about were a variety of interestingly attired individuals. Obviously there were a lot of goggles wandering around, but the attire ranged from the expected pseudo victoriana through to 40's and 50's and beyond. So just looking at the crowd was interesting enough.
The acts on offer gave a fair variety of entertainments. Obviously some were better than others, depending on your tastes. For example we had an interesting chap called Bruce Airhead who climed inside a balloon in a suprisingly interesting way, and Voltini, who aside from being made of raw SCIENCE! actually shoved an electrode right up his arse. That might not sound particularly enticing, but then he did light a peanut butter sandwich on fire using an electric woman.
I guess I'm saying that you really had to be there.
Despite arriving somewhat later than intended, and leaving somewhat earlier a good time was had by all. But then we had V.I.P. tickets, and were thus inherently special. If no other reason than we didn't have to engage in the standard melee to reach the bar with the rest of the proles. Shockingly however there was a distinct lack of tea on offer, which was a little dissapointing.
Especially when you consider the whole thing was MC'd by this guy:
Thursday, 28 January 2010
The Loneliness Of The Long Distance Blogger
So, in a no doubt vain attempt to assuage my cravings for affection I have put aside the few scraps of dignity I may have had left and signed up to... a dating site.
I do this not in any serious hope or expectation of meeting any social or romantic partners, but for the same reason I play the lottery: to illustrate the futility of the excersize. "You don't know if you don't try" they say to me. To which I of course counter "actually, I DO know. I know exactly what will happen. NOTHING. But, in the interests of scientific rigour I will go waste my time in order to shut you up".
So, what's the problem with the whole online dating thing I hear you ask? Well, it goes something like this. When we sign up we are first asked to illustrate our narcissism by uploading pictures or ourselves. Then we are asked to prove our egocentricity by writing severel lengthy paeons to how utterly fantastic and interesting we are. Then, after all that we supposed to demonstrate our obnoxious nature by randomly hassling complete strangers.
And this, somehow is supposed to impress people.
Of course I'm glossing over the whole fact that the reason we're all there in the first place is because we're all social rejects and emotional cripples completely incapable of attracting a mate in the real world, and thus even if you do somehow end up meeting someone they will be mentally unstable to a frightening degree.
I know I am.
I do this not in any serious hope or expectation of meeting any social or romantic partners, but for the same reason I play the lottery: to illustrate the futility of the excersize. "You don't know if you don't try" they say to me. To which I of course counter "actually, I DO know. I know exactly what will happen. NOTHING. But, in the interests of scientific rigour I will go waste my time in order to shut you up".
So, what's the problem with the whole online dating thing I hear you ask? Well, it goes something like this. When we sign up we are first asked to illustrate our narcissism by uploading pictures or ourselves. Then we are asked to prove our egocentricity by writing severel lengthy paeons to how utterly fantastic and interesting we are. Then, after all that we supposed to demonstrate our obnoxious nature by randomly hassling complete strangers.
And this, somehow is supposed to impress people.
Of course I'm glossing over the whole fact that the reason we're all there in the first place is because we're all social rejects and emotional cripples completely incapable of attracting a mate in the real world, and thus even if you do somehow end up meeting someone they will be mentally unstable to a frightening degree.
I know I am.
Sunday, 24 January 2010
I Stumble 4 Porn
This is a post that does exactly what it says on the tin. In the spirit of living dangerously I have decided to try turning on the porn on Stumble Upon and see what comes up.
I'm not really sure why. Boredom I suppose. Porn is good for boredom, right?
Wrong, wrong, wrong. I suppose I was hoping for some form of nightmarish internet sex to come up and then we could point at it and laugh an go eeewww.
But no. If there's one thing that this exercize has confirmed to me it's just how incredibly boring porn is. That's assuming you can even define it as porn. according to the dictionary pornography is defined as:
Is a picture of a lady who just happens to be naked REALLY porn then? I mean are we really that disconnected that the sight of a womans ankles will drive us mad with desire? Maybe I'm just old and jaded, but it seems to me there should be something more involved than the mere existence of boobs.
Now, to be fair, you do occasionally get something with an actual penis in. But why does it always seem so ridiculous? Here is a naked lady. Having SEX! In her BUMHOLE!!! But why is she wearing that ridiculous hat?!?! I mean, she's indoors for a start. And it's an old mans flat cap, like something out of Steptoe and Son or something. Incongrous much?
Well, fine. Average porn is obviously not going to provide much trauma for discussion. Let's try FETISH porn. Thats gotta be freaky, right?
Meanwhile, behind the facade of this innocent looking dictionary....
Well, I hate to argue with the dictionary, but thats not quite right. Fetish Sexuality actually involves either
I'm not really sure where I'm going with all this (as with most things I write). Perhaps just that I went looking at porn for ages, and rather than touching myself I went and did the washing up instead. Not that I'd tell you if it'd gone differently.
OR WOULD I?
Ahh, there's the trauma. I knew we'd get there in the end.
I'm not really sure why. Boredom I suppose. Porn is good for boredom, right?
Wrong, wrong, wrong. I suppose I was hoping for some form of nightmarish internet sex to come up and then we could point at it and laugh an go eeewww.
But no. If there's one thing that this exercize has confirmed to me it's just how incredibly boring porn is. That's assuming you can even define it as porn. according to the dictionary pornography is defined as:
Sexually explicit pictures, writing, or other material whose primary purpose is to cause sexual arousal.
obscene writings, drawings, photographs, or the like, esp. those having little or no artistic merit.
Is a picture of a lady who just happens to be naked REALLY porn then? I mean are we really that disconnected that the sight of a womans ankles will drive us mad with desire? Maybe I'm just old and jaded, but it seems to me there should be something more involved than the mere existence of boobs.
Now, to be fair, you do occasionally get something with an actual penis in. But why does it always seem so ridiculous? Here is a naked lady. Having SEX! In her BUMHOLE!!! But why is she wearing that ridiculous hat?!?! I mean, she's indoors for a start. And it's an old mans flat cap, like something out of Steptoe and Son or something. Incongrous much?
Well, fine. Average porn is obviously not going to provide much trauma for discussion. Let's try FETISH porn. Thats gotta be freaky, right?
Meanwhile, behind the facade of this innocent looking dictionary....
any object or nongenital part of the body that causes a habitual erotic response or fixation
Something, such as a material object or a nonsexual part of the body, that arouses sexual desire and may become necessary for sexual gratification
An abnormally obsessive preoccupation or attachment; a fixation
Well, I hate to argue with the dictionary, but thats not quite right. Fetish Sexuality actually involves either
- Bondage
- Latex
- Rock Chicks
I'm not really sure where I'm going with all this (as with most things I write). Perhaps just that I went looking at porn for ages, and rather than touching myself I went and did the washing up instead. Not that I'd tell you if it'd gone differently.
OR WOULD I?
Ahh, there's the trauma. I knew we'd get there in the end.
Saturday, 9 January 2010
Required Reading: Barefoot Gen
If there's a single Manga that I could point to and say that it has had a profound impact on me, it would have to be Barefoot Gen. I'm not quite sure if I can really express the impact of this book, but I'm going to try. Because as far as I'm concerned this is a book that NEEDS to be read.
I first discovered this book in, of all places, school. Back in the day (when steam powered dinosaurs ruled the earth and we ate rocks for breakfast) before I'd even heard of the word Manga. I was in the library, at lunchtime, going through the Asterix and Tintin books for something to read when I found it. 2 Volumes of Barefoot Gen. So I naively picked one up and read it. Only I couldn't actually read it all the way through. I had to go for a breathe of fresh air before I could face finishing them. I was still young then, and far less inured to the horrors on offer than I later became (I couldn't handle Tesuo the first time either).
The story is fairly straightfoward. It follows the life of Gen and is family, in the closing days of world war 2. They live in Hiroshima.
You can see where this is going.
There's just something about the straightforward way the horrors of the bomb are depicted. I'd never before seen anything quite like it. Even now I find it disturbing. It's.... unflinching? The whole point of the book is basically to bring home to the reader the magnitude of human suffering involved, and I think this goal is acheived. I think the simple fact that this is a semi autobiographical work is what really does it. The simple fact that what we're presented with is REAL.
Of course since then I've discovered that the book goes on far beyond what I saw in my childhood. 10 volumes total, depicting the aftermath of the bomb and the surrender on the lives of people.
It's a major strength of the work that it doesn't flinch from it's criticizing of both the Americans who dropped the bomb, but also the Japanese powers who started the war. The first volume gives you a disturbing taste of what it was like in Japan during the war. A place of fanatical nationalism and conformity gone mad. This I feel is very important in any work dealing with this period. The use of nuclear weapons granted Japan as a nation a certain sense of victimhood, but it's easy for that to overshadow the crimes Japan commited in the war. Including crimes against it's own people.
So, the story continues on, in it's strangely compelling way. Ordinary people in extraordinary circumstances is perhaps a phrase that you could use, cliched as it is. Gen, his family and friends struggle to survive, despite all the suffering and misfortune that is thrown in their way. And unrelenting suffering is quite a running theme. As much as you want for the fated happily ever after the characters so obviously deserve to appear it never does. But they go on, trying hard and doing their best. Because it's basically that or die.
Inspiring and horrifying in equal measure, this is really an epic story of the true costs of war, and of it's victims.
More people should read this, especially nowadays.
I first discovered this book in, of all places, school. Back in the day (when steam powered dinosaurs ruled the earth and we ate rocks for breakfast) before I'd even heard of the word Manga. I was in the library, at lunchtime, going through the Asterix and Tintin books for something to read when I found it. 2 Volumes of Barefoot Gen. So I naively picked one up and read it. Only I couldn't actually read it all the way through. I had to go for a breathe of fresh air before I could face finishing them. I was still young then, and far less inured to the horrors on offer than I later became (I couldn't handle Tesuo the first time either).
The story is fairly straightfoward. It follows the life of Gen and is family, in the closing days of world war 2. They live in Hiroshima.
You can see where this is going.
There's just something about the straightforward way the horrors of the bomb are depicted. I'd never before seen anything quite like it. Even now I find it disturbing. It's.... unflinching? The whole point of the book is basically to bring home to the reader the magnitude of human suffering involved, and I think this goal is acheived. I think the simple fact that this is a semi autobiographical work is what really does it. The simple fact that what we're presented with is REAL.
Of course since then I've discovered that the book goes on far beyond what I saw in my childhood. 10 volumes total, depicting the aftermath of the bomb and the surrender on the lives of people.
It's a major strength of the work that it doesn't flinch from it's criticizing of both the Americans who dropped the bomb, but also the Japanese powers who started the war. The first volume gives you a disturbing taste of what it was like in Japan during the war. A place of fanatical nationalism and conformity gone mad. This I feel is very important in any work dealing with this period. The use of nuclear weapons granted Japan as a nation a certain sense of victimhood, but it's easy for that to overshadow the crimes Japan commited in the war. Including crimes against it's own people.
So, the story continues on, in it's strangely compelling way. Ordinary people in extraordinary circumstances is perhaps a phrase that you could use, cliched as it is. Gen, his family and friends struggle to survive, despite all the suffering and misfortune that is thrown in their way. And unrelenting suffering is quite a running theme. As much as you want for the fated happily ever after the characters so obviously deserve to appear it never does. But they go on, trying hard and doing their best. Because it's basically that or die.
Inspiring and horrifying in equal measure, this is really an epic story of the true costs of war, and of it's victims.
More people should read this, especially nowadays.
Friday, 18 December 2009
We Can Name Him Beowulf
Oh my god you guys, it totally snowed last night!!
Now, I normally hate snow with seething distaste, but this morning I have been jumping around in it like a 5 year old whilst on my way to work, whilst quietly singing the snowman song from cannibal the musical.
What is the cause of this inexplicable joie de vivre?
Could it be the childish glee of glomping through 6 inch drifts of untouched snow, the first living creature to profane it's cold tranquility?
Or maybe it's more to do with the fact that in all likelyhood no one else will be in today so I'll get to go home early?
I have the strange urge to go out with my Ultraman toys and take pictures of them in the snow, but there are two minor drawbacks to this plan. Firstly to actually get at any snow worth photographing you've basically gotta destroy it first, and secondly I haven't got a Glozam figure.
Yet.
Still, the garden looks awesome as it's basically completely buried.
P.S. I just looked around towards where my legs are positioned close to the heaters, and there are copious amounts of steam coming from them. Maybe sitting a little too close?
Now, I normally hate snow with seething distaste, but this morning I have been jumping around in it like a 5 year old whilst on my way to work, whilst quietly singing the snowman song from cannibal the musical.
What is the cause of this inexplicable joie de vivre?
Could it be the childish glee of glomping through 6 inch drifts of untouched snow, the first living creature to profane it's cold tranquility?
Or maybe it's more to do with the fact that in all likelyhood no one else will be in today so I'll get to go home early?
I have the strange urge to go out with my Ultraman toys and take pictures of them in the snow, but there are two minor drawbacks to this plan. Firstly to actually get at any snow worth photographing you've basically gotta destroy it first, and secondly I haven't got a Glozam figure.
Yet.
Still, the garden looks awesome as it's basically completely buried.
P.S. I just looked around towards where my legs are positioned close to the heaters, and there are copious amounts of steam coming from them. Maybe sitting a little too close?
Friday, 21 August 2009
[old blog import] It's like shitting africa.
So then, a review of the weeks culinary escapades
Saturday: Zebra steak with cracked black peppers, sea salt and pink pink peppercorns. Served with swwet potato wedges, onion rings and garlic mushrooms.
Monday: Ostrich is spicy chilli stir fry.
Tuesday: Camel and chips.
Wednesday: Crocodile cooked with soy sauce, sticky rice and miso.
Thursday: cajun style Kangaroo with sweet potato wedges.
Friday: Wildebeest, wedges, onion rings, garlic mushrooms.
All in all and interesting experiment. The various meats ranged from the rather fucking tasty to the fairly meh, but only the camel didn't really impress. The crocodile I admit could have come out better, but I couldn't just slap EVERYTHING in the grill with a bit of spice now could I? Kangaroo and Ostrich were rather good, as were the Zebra and Wildebeest. All in all I guess it does depend on your culinary skills, something I personally lack. But I didn't manage to make any of it inedible. Which, considering the prices, was something of a relief.
The question I suppose is would I do it again? The answer is probably yes. There are, after all, far more animals that I haven't eaten than I have, and it's good to try new things. It's not something I'd do often however, as whilst variety may be the spice of life it is also the scourge of the wallet. In all honesty you get do it with a decent bit of conventional meat, but where's the fun in that?
Part of the attraction for this kind of thing is simply being able to say you've done it. And I have.
Lucky fucking me, eh?
Saturday: Zebra steak with cracked black peppers, sea salt and pink pink peppercorns. Served with swwet potato wedges, onion rings and garlic mushrooms.
Monday: Ostrich is spicy chilli stir fry.
Tuesday: Camel and chips.
Wednesday: Crocodile cooked with soy sauce, sticky rice and miso.
Thursday: cajun style Kangaroo with sweet potato wedges.
Friday: Wildebeest, wedges, onion rings, garlic mushrooms.
All in all and interesting experiment. The various meats ranged from the rather fucking tasty to the fairly meh, but only the camel didn't really impress. The crocodile I admit could have come out better, but I couldn't just slap EVERYTHING in the grill with a bit of spice now could I? Kangaroo and Ostrich were rather good, as were the Zebra and Wildebeest. All in all I guess it does depend on your culinary skills, something I personally lack. But I didn't manage to make any of it inedible. Which, considering the prices, was something of a relief.
The question I suppose is would I do it again? The answer is probably yes. There are, after all, far more animals that I haven't eaten than I have, and it's good to try new things. It's not something I'd do often however, as whilst variety may be the spice of life it is also the scourge of the wallet. In all honesty you get do it with a decent bit of conventional meat, but where's the fun in that?
Part of the attraction for this kind of thing is simply being able to say you've done it. And I have.
Lucky fucking me, eh?
Saturday, 4 April 2009
[old blog import] This Is GOJIRA!!!!
I've just been to the theatre luvvie.
Up to London to catch a little play called Men Of Monsters. Which I found about entirely by random this week when a publicity stunt they pulled with a monkey suit cropped up on one of the various blogs I monitor. I'm starting to get the hang of this internets buisness.
The basic idea of the piece is a (fictional) production of King Kong Vs Godzilla being staged during the cuban missile crisis, and the various character conflicts reflecting the larger situation. Or something. Certainly there's plenty to get your mental teeth into should you go in for that sort of thing. However the whole piece is thankfully incredibly entertaining as well. It's actually VERY funny throughout, and brilliantly realised by the actors.
It has been noted that the play, shall we say, misses some facts about the actual production. But if your getting hung up on the fact that the actual film wasn't filmed in Hollywood and the like then I feel that you're kind of missing the point. Though being an obsessive G-fan does at least give you an extra layer to when someone makes a joke about the movie being a satire. Because the actual film IS a satire of corporate mentality. You just wouldn't neccessarily realise that if you've only had the misfortune of seeing the american cut.
I mean, I'VE only seen that cut, but I also have several books on the subject of Godzilla and an internets to use for reference. So I know. And knowing is half the battle.
I really couldn't say a bad thing. I loved the whole thing, and would easily go see it again. Except it finishes next week and I'm on call so I can't anyway. But I strongly recommend catching it if you can.
It has put me in a really GOOD mood. And there are very few things in this world that can say that.
Up to London to catch a little play called Men Of Monsters. Which I found about entirely by random this week when a publicity stunt they pulled with a monkey suit cropped up on one of the various blogs I monitor. I'm starting to get the hang of this internets buisness.
The basic idea of the piece is a (fictional) production of King Kong Vs Godzilla being staged during the cuban missile crisis, and the various character conflicts reflecting the larger situation. Or something. Certainly there's plenty to get your mental teeth into should you go in for that sort of thing. However the whole piece is thankfully incredibly entertaining as well. It's actually VERY funny throughout, and brilliantly realised by the actors.
It has been noted that the play, shall we say, misses some facts about the actual production. But if your getting hung up on the fact that the actual film wasn't filmed in Hollywood and the like then I feel that you're kind of missing the point. Though being an obsessive G-fan does at least give you an extra layer to when someone makes a joke about the movie being a satire. Because the actual film IS a satire of corporate mentality. You just wouldn't neccessarily realise that if you've only had the misfortune of seeing the american cut.
I mean, I'VE only seen that cut, but I also have several books on the subject of Godzilla and an internets to use for reference. So I know. And knowing is half the battle.
I really couldn't say a bad thing. I loved the whole thing, and would easily go see it again. Except it finishes next week and I'm on call so I can't anyway. But I strongly recommend catching it if you can.
It has put me in a really GOOD mood. And there are very few things in this world that can say that.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)