And Now I Shout At My Watch

Mari chan no sukaato wa chiisana desu. Mari chan no pantsu wa shiroi desu.

Sorry, what was I saying?

Red Baron. No, not Richthofen, this is the Japanese one. Whilst both are capable of flight and feats of daring do, this one happens to be a giant robot. There are a few reasons to pick up this particular series. Firstly of course there's the simple fact that you either love tokusatsu or you hate freedom, but I must confess that there were 2 major contributions to my initial decision to purchase this: That I could and that it was cheap.

It's a sad fact that the tokusatsu market is rather underrepresented outside of Japan. despite the huge wealth of shows there simply doesn't seem to be anyone releasing them with the all important english subtitles. The few shows that have been released seem to go out of print quite quickly and rapidly become very expensive and hard to find. So it's good that someone seems to have picked up Iron King and Red Baron again and re released them. Unfortunately this release does seem to be lacking some of the bells and whistles, lacking the booklet of the original release. Going by what was included with original Iron King boxset this is rather disappointing. It would be nice to get some background, production detail or stories from the cast. But we do at least get the show itself. So, whats it like?

Well, it's a 70's tokusatsu production for young boys about giant robots. If you have a problem with this sort of thing then you're not my friend, go away. If you enjoy that sort of thing you may well find something to enjoy here. The plot, such as it is, is rather designed to serve the ultimate purpose of having large metal men punch each other on a weekly basis. To start with Professor Deviler of the evil Iron Alliance steals all the worlds giant robots. All except one. The good one. That would be the one in the title. It's incredible to see just how awesome a world would be if every country on earth was compelled to built a giant robot for some reason. That's 70's futurism for you. Of course it's perfectly reasonable for the Spanish to build a giant bullfighter. What else would they do?

Anyway, the series continues in this way for quite a while, and I confess it did seem to lag a bit towards the middle. Sure, the effects were well done, the designs were imaginative. There was an interesting variety to the plot and tone ranging from noir as fuck to comedic to hallucinatory trippyness. But after a while it did seem to tire a little. And then things suddenly turned epic. Halfway through they suddenly kill off half the cast, including the bad guy! That really made me sit up and take notice again. The stakes were raised, the show was refreshed and we suddenly found our way hurtling towards the epic conclusion in space! It's interesting to see that the production staff were aware of how the show was going, and were not afraid to shake things up a little, or even a lot. It's at times like this though that the lack of extras really bites, as I'm really intrigued to know what was going on in the office around that time.

But aside from all the usual devices that keep you watching, there was one other point of great excitement for me over the course of the series, one that I feel I must address. They say a picture is worth a thousand words...

The word is pantsu.

Now don't get me wrong, there is a lot more to the character than her compellingly short garment. As strong female characters go in kids shows from the 70's she's pretty good. She kicks ass and doesn't manage to captured or mind controlled more than anyone else. When she gets ignored for being a girl it usually turns out she's right. Not a sappy dumb stay at home screamer by means.

But goddamn, that skirt is not long. Seriously, if you ever wonder if you're turning gay watch a few episodes of Red Baron. It's a good test.

Anyway, in some sort of summation then: We have a good solid show, with some fair degree of imagination. They never skimp on the excitement or explosives, but still manage to cram a bit of human drama in with the giant robot action. I can't honestly say it manages to scale the dizzy heights of Ultraman, but it's not afraid to try. Should anyone ever make a show that combine the greatness of Ultraman with the shortness of Mari's skirt I will die a happy man, possibly immediately as I suffer an anime scale nosebleed.

String Theory

Well now, the latest series of Doctor Who has finished and TV is now officially done with until christmas. All we have to fill the resulting gap is the last 2 parts of the adventure games and the live show.

Oh gods, but the prospect of a Doctor Who stage show is making me dribble. As a hopeless Ultraman fan I can safelt say that there is nothing better than a live stage. I've got my ticket booked.

Anyway, it's at this stage that I should be giving forth my opinions on the state of play. Whilst my brainwrong caused me to miss out on reviewing the series on a story by story basis I seem to be currently stable enough that I can at least offer something of a retrospective.

But first, some internet pedantry. Now the adventure games are, it has to be said, generally pretty sweet. To finally get a Doctpr Who game thats not only good but also free is something to be celebrate. However the latest chapter Blood Of The Cybermen raises some interesting issues about continuity and canonicity. Assuming thats even a word. See, the production team has been fairly emphatic in selling these as 4 extra episodes, which is all well and good. The new series has progressed fairly rapidly, but there are some points into which you could squeeze in bonus adventures. However it's made pretty clear in The Pandorica Opens that that is the first time Amy has ever encountered a Cyberman. Then at the end of The Big Bang she sets off again with the Doctor AND Rory. Yet the adventure games only feature the Doctor and Amy. So when is this supposed to be set?

Oh, and the answer, in case you need me to make up your mind for you, is "it doesn't matter".

So, onto the series itself then. There's lots of obvious things you could say. Matt Smith is a superlative Doctor and nails the part right from the off. Yes, we know. It's honestly so obvious that it really doesn't need stating anymore, despite the fact that I've just done exactly that. Yes, the show is very different despite being the same. It may sound paradoxical, but thats the way it is. The more things change and all that. Who would have ever thought that changing the production staff would result in a difference of tone? Shocking I know.

I suppose where it get's interesting is in the way the themes have been layered and built up over the series to result in a rather more cohesive finale. Whilst it does in all honesty share a bit of the deus ex machina qualities we've become accustomed to it's been built up to a little more so that the inevitable reset feels a bit less of a cheat than ususual. And it does have to be said that the whole thing had obviously been very tightly planned. The opening montage of scenes recalling characters from earlier episodes immediatly provoking a response of "ooooo, I wonder when they filmed that?" Indeed, it's because the whole thing is so tightly put together that the the loose ends become so interesting.

Probably the biggest dissapointment of the finale is simply that we don't actually find ANYTHING out. It's a little frustrating that after all the build up there is no real resolution. I mean yeah, the universe got rebooted. But we have no clue whatsoever WHY it got blown up in the first place. In a way though I have to think this may be a good thing, as instead of introducing and discarding the ultimate villain of ultimate destiny over the course of about an hour we may now get a whole series to further establish the threat and work towards countering it. The fact that this has apperently been the plan all along does stike me as being somewhat audacious.

But it's the OTHER loose ends that I find intriguing, as there's certain things that I can help but think should be revisited come the new series. It was only as I rewatched the latter half of the series that it really struck me how much more there is to be done with some of these stories. Firstly there's the Silurian issue. Now, as a species they're always going to be a loose end because you can't resolve them in a contemporary setting, and they're to cool to permantly kill off. But in this we have a guy who, after getting poisoned doesn't die. He begins MUTATING we are told. Mutating into what? And then he goes into hibernation for the next thousand years. So, is it just me or is that screaming futuristic follow up featuring human/silurian hybrid? And then of course there's the ship from The Lodger. Someone's attempt to build a TARDIS? To say that this is an event significant beyond the scope of the episode is a slight understatement. The Time Lords are all dead but someone is trying to build TARDISes (TARDISi?). Who has the technology to do something like that other than the Daleks? Might it be in some way connected with the shadowy extra dimensional forces attempting to destroy the very fabric of time and space? Or is it just the result of having more money left over for sets than they originally thought? Either way it's something that demands a little more than a throwaway line, at least to my mind. In a series that throws in an apparent subtle continuity error as an important plot point for the eagle eyed these sort of things stand out as hints of things to come rather than missed opportunities.

Also intruiging is the temporal fossilisation of the axis of evil at the start of The Big Bang. Am I the only one who saw a room full of petrified figures and found the visual reference strikingly evocative of the Weeping Angels? A clue or hint, or nothing at all? Who knows (other than Moffat), but it should keep the conspiracy theorists going for a while. After all, who's to say whats significant or not (other than Moffat)?

All in all I'd say this was a very succesful series. A lot more succesful, it has to be said, than Dvid Tennants first, which did suffer from a tremendous degree of absolute bobbins. I mean a fucking alien love ship? REALLY?  A bold new statement of what the show is capable of being and a shifting onto a new track as it were. I look forward to seeing how the seeds of this newfound sense of forward planning bear fruit.

We Are Not French

Well, how was that for a homosexual agenda?

Last night we went to see Versailles. I don't mean the place in france, or whoever it was that meant the real band had to append -Philharmonic Quintet- to their international releases. I mean the REAL Versailles. You know, the ones from Castlevania.

"Tonight we ride for Draculas castle!"

It was a supremely good show, though not without it's annoyances. The first for me being purely personal in that I didn't manage to spot P-Chan anywhere. However I'm probably not even legally allowed to actually know here. Frankly I was probably pushing my luck just being in the same room as that many teenage girls. There was, of course, the usual hassle with the opening of the doors and the letting in of us screaming hordes, however I guess the tardiness of the entry was offset by all the worrying fiddling that went on prior to the band finally taking the stage, so I doubt anyone missed anything.

And it's that worrying fiddling that will come back to haunt us I'm afraid. The light go down, the dramatic music starts and the band take to the stage, resplendent in their finery. They look, of course, gorgeous. Why is it that I can't find anywhere that sells clothes like that. And even if I could, why couldn't I afford them? Woe is me.

Anyway, I digress. They launch into God Palace as the first song and I'm all like "SQUEE" since aside from being an awesome song I was thinking that it would be really cool if they played that as an opener. And you think that's great I actually predicted the encore songs as well. Of course, I have no proof of this, but it's pretty awesome when you think to yourself "hmmm, probably they'll play The Red Carpet Day and/or The Revenant Choir" AND THEN THEY DO EXACTLY THAT. As I said; fucking SQUEE, bitches.

The entire set is, it has to be said, awesome as fuck. I don't think there was any song that I wished they played but they didn't. Loud and heavy and spot on in their performance, Versailles proved themselves to be a brilliant live band. It's almost a cliche when it comes to the Japanese bands I've seen, but only were they thoroughly engaging they were also clearly chuffed to be here. And really, what is it about Japanese people trying to speak english that is so goddamn ADORABLE?

However whilst the band were giving their all on stage to make this a great concert, someone else was off stage trying to ruin it.

No, it's not the Mecha Robos of the Iron Alliance.

Hates freedom

It was the sound man.

I'd call the sound quality variable, except that doesn't contain the words shitty and frustrating. A whole range of problems cropped up over the course of the concert, one after the other. Bass frequencies peaking alarmingly, then one of the guitars dropping out almost completely, then it came back only to loud whilst the vocals suddenly shot down... In the end it was more like flies on your cake than shitting in your mouth, but the point still remains.

Now there's one other point that needs addressing. Whilst I wouldn't say it was exactly oppresively hot in there or anything it was certainly warm enough that most people leaving could be classified as a sweaty abomination. I certainly was. But heres the thing, and I didn't even realize until S-San pointed out to me on the train home, the band didn't appear to sweat at all. They're up there at the front, under all the light and the collective head of a thousand furiously bopping teenagers in some of the most fantastically overblown gothic outfits this side of Symphony Of The Night, and they look perfectly fine.

I

 If only more gigs looked like this

HOW? How do they do that? I've seen plenty of bands stumbling off that stage dripping wrecks. Are they Autons or something? In which case why didn't they shoot the goddamn sound guy?

Maybe they're actually vampires? It's possible. I mean, I've seen pictures of them in daylight and they didn't sparkle or anything.

How visual kei is part of the gay agenda

Oh Linkbait Generator, are you even trying?

First, to gay people have an agenda? Is it like being in Cobra or something? Do they get secret underground lairs in which to plot the downfall of society? Pehaps gay marriage is actually a codename for a type of missile, which even now is aimed at YOU. You know, like how in Cobra everything named after snakes in some fashion. Maybe they have equal rights tanks and my sexual preferences are none of your damn buisness bombers?

Perhaps not.

Anyway, to address the issue at hand, allow me to introduce a member of Versailles -Philharmonic Quintet-

Isn't she gorgeous?

Well, as some would have it....

Yeah, thats a man. And you know what?

I DON'T CARE. I still would and so would you.

This is of course but one example. Visual Kei generally tends to feature a certain amount of transvestism, androgeny and gender blurring. There's more attractive guys in VK bands than there are in most entire countries.

So THAT'S how VK is part of the G.A.Y. agenda (all shadowy oragnizations names must be acronyms. I don't know what it stands for, but I know that it will make NO SENSE AT ALL). It totally makes you gay.

Unless your a chick I guess. But then according to my internet researches all women are lesbians anyway. Though quite how they find the time to do anything else is a mystery.

Guild Wars: In Review

And I'm afraid that's where I have to leave it. You see, I've been playing on a demo account, and my time is nearly up. Though to be fair I think I've been through most of the starter area quests.

So aside from my rambling incoherency over the past umpteen chapters, what is the game actually like?

Well, as MMOs go it is one. It seems to do all the standard sort of things MMOs do, only it does them slightly differently. Game wise the obvious being the instanced nature of the world. The only common areas are the towns. This is a little odd, but in a good way. Aside from the obvious advantage of not having random arseholes hassling you and camping the one thing you need to kill it also means that quests actually get done. So for example when you go out and kill the evil beast it actually stays dead. This is great as it helps to avoid the general feeling of futility that usually permeates your every action in these things.

Is does make getting screen caps for a series of articles a bit annoying, since you can't go always go back a second time for the shots you want.

Gameplay wise it seems like it might quite interesting when you really get into it. The dual class thing is intriguing, but the real oddity is the stats and powers, such as they are. Basically you get a number of skill groups to distribute points into which improve the related skills. But you can redistribute these any time you're in a town. You learn the powers from going out and finding the appropriate trainers, but you only have 8 slots in your bar. So you get the challenge of building your character in a way to best suit whatever it is you're doing. And it nicely avoids the clutter of having twenty bars stacked up with abilities, which is also nice. Another weird thing is the lack of potions. Your health and mana naturally restore over time, which is nice as it does avoid the whole trudging 16 miles back to town because your health is to low and getting picked of by some random weenie thing. Travel is also surprisingly unpainful, as you can always teleport back to any town area you've already visited. This is a tremendous help, and doesn't even clutter your inventory up with scrolls of town portal.

Story wise there probably is one, but I honestly wasn't paying that much attention. The fact that a story might actually be able to advance somewhere is rather intriguing though. The subquests are all diverting enough, though some are obviously a little less silly than others. The game does get bonus points for it's seeming lack of "kill 12 boars" missions. Interestingly there ARE NPCs dotted around who want arbitrary amounts of the random crap that monsters seem to drop, but they don't give out tedious grindy quests to that effect. They'll just trade you X walrus spleens or whatever for whatever items they have on offer. How useful these items are is of course varied and debatable.

I can't really comment on the multiplayer aspects because, like most of not all games, I don't know anyone else who plays. It's probably quite fun if you like that sort of thing. There were at least a few quests which required more than one person though.

I do have to say that I was quite impressed with the game overall, and the demo seemed pretty well set up. Sure there are limits (like you can't drop items), but the time limit seems reasonable to get to the end of the starter area and give you a good taste of the game. The real question I suppose is would I actually buy it?

This is of course where things get really interesting. Because you CAN buy Guild Wars. No fees, no bullshit, no feeling like you have to spend all your time logged in to get your monies worth. Just buy the game and then play it as much as you like. If you like it then maybe buy an expansion. Truly a revolutionary approach, and one I wish more (I.E. any) games would take. The best part of course being that I looked on amazon and found it for £7. THAT'S value for fucking money. Hell, you can get a full set of all the expansions for about £18. All I can say here is "suck it, warcraft".

I guess if I had to sum up the feeling I got from Guild Wars it would be like someone tried to make a MMO which doesn't suck. That this should be a rare and original concept is fairly depressing, but most stuff seems content just to try and be warcraft. The fact that you can be a Necromancer and have a small girl follow you around is just icing on the cake. All in all a good time I'd say.

Now if you'' excuse me I'm gonna go finish up my last 45 minutes of demo time. And then maybe go shopping.

Let's Play Guild Wars Part The Ninth: Vegan Do This the Easy Way, Or The Hard Way

Consulting the ragged and bloodstained scrap of incoherent parchment that serves as my To Do list, I see that once more I am running out of excuses to kill ways to aid the community. Seems all that's left is to go deliver a message.

Because when you say Necromancer everyone else thinks Postman.

Well, whatever. Head to this Regent Valley Place, deliver the note to lord whoever, and then I'm sure they'll be someone to point me in the direction of something that needs murdering.

I've seen a lot of nasty things on my travels, but nothing like the sight that greets me upon my arrival. No, not the hordes of giant scorpions.

Have we got a video?

Rangers. Oh JOY. No wonder the place is crawling with mutated vermin. I've always thought that one of the great advantages of being a Necromancer is that at least a 3 week old corpse doesn't smell as bad as a goddamn HIPPIE. Still, it would be remiss of me to not at least attempt communication. Perhaps some scraps of useful information may have penetrated the perpetual noxious ganja haze surrounding his so called mind.

"good day to you sir" quoth I, full of trepidation and mild nausea. How far can fleas jump again?

"I'm a ranger!" It says, as if impressed by the revelation.

"Oh. I'm terribly sorry to hear that. Is there anything I can do to help?"

I'd say he merely stared at me blankly, but it's hard to tell. I'm not sure he's capable of anything else. Must be all that mushroom granola or whatever. Still, let's keep trying. I foolishly ask if he might know where I could find some Necromantic training.

Sorry Mario, your class trainer is in another castle

No you stupid hippie. I AM a bloody Necromancer.

WHERE. IS. THE. NEAREST. OTHER. NEC-RO-MAN-CER?

Sorry Mario, your class trainer is...... Dude. My hands are HUGE... They can touch everything but themselves...

Oh just fuck off.

Leaving the rancid stench of patchouli and unwashed genitalia behind I venture onwards towards my goal. Well, the place I'm meant to be being postbitch for. My goal is to kill all the hippies. For some reason however this doesn't seem to be an option, so I settle for the local fauna instead. Scorpions and bandits and fish people, oh my!

But lo, what is this I see before me? Why it appears to be a punctuated peasant! Punctuation means employment, and employment means plausible deniability. Perchance are there any rancid hippies you need slaughtering madam?

I'll take that as a no then.

Spiders. Spiders stole your apple basket. Apple loving spiders? Do spiders usually eat apples? Are these, like, VEGETARIAN spiders or something? Maybe they caught something from the hippies?

Anyway, let's get this straight. Vegetarian spiders came by looking for apples and you ran away because you didn't know what else to do. It's just a thought, but why didn't you take that battle axe you're offering me and cut their bloody legs off? Or is that me being obvious again? Well, whatever. I'll get back to you. I've gotta go pick up some tofu to bait the traps with.

Moving on....

We reach the fort and find the lord and hand over the note, remembering to wipe most of the congealed guts off it first. I have been carrying around for quite a while.

He's so fussed at the news that he spends 10 minutes bitching about the guy who sent it in the first place. To be fair, I don't really see what all the fuss was about either, but then I didn't see anything when he allegedly urned up on account of being dead for most of the fight. He probably thinks someones making the whole thing up, and frankly I'm inclined to agree with him.

Anyway, let's check out this mighty fort. Must be few folks round here need some murdering done, right?

It's..... quiet. Isn't it? Seriously, there's something fishy going on here. I KILLED more people on the way here than live in this entire fortress. And they were BANDITS.

 Zombies (none) copy and paste. repeat.

What sort of society can you have where 98% of it are criminal outcasts? DEAD criminal outcasts. Not that I have that much against the concept, but who exactly is it that these bandits are stealing FROM? Each other?

Zombies (1) copy and paste repeat 

Do they have little bandit babies? And special Bandit schools and shops? Are there special bandit police who come for you when you're NOT breaking the law?

Zombies (3) copy and pate. Repeat.

  That's... I'm.... I'm gonna stop thinking about this. It hurts my head. No wonder they're renting their services out to the goddamn bears.

Let's go pick apples!

After a brief stroll through woods infested with bandits and fish men we find the woods infested with giant spiders. Giant VEGETARIAN spiders.

Meat is murder!! And so is this!!

And sure enough the fiends are staking out the fabled apple basket of wrath. Apparently these apples are so HARDCORE they couldn't just eat them straight away. Or maybe they're going to bake a pie and were busy doing the pastry. I dunno.

This one is apparently also addicted to heroin

Sadly their culinary ambitions are never to be realized. Which is kind of shame when you think about it. How awesome would it be to watch giant spiders BAKING A PIE? You'd never need to do drugs again.

Fruits of DARKNESS.

Still, maybe the spiders were onto something after all. Because on the way back with the fruit the fishmen go FUCKING CRAZY.

Yes, I am casting fireball using a bowl of fruit. Do you have a problem with that?

So the fruit is returned to it's rightful owner (no, not the tree) and there is much rejoicing. But I can't help but have this funny feeling about the whole affair. Let's see if we can't  puzzle this out.

1 - I am contracted to retrieve a basket of merchandise.
2 - My employer is rather keen to retrieve said basket, and fears retribution from their employer should the merchandise not be returned
3 - Everything and everybody is REALLY keen to take the basket from me.
4 - The districts human population are almost entirely all criminals
5 - NEEDLE spiders.

Conclusion: Apples weren't the only thing in that basket and I am now a drugs mule for the mob.

Fuck this. This isn't what I signed on for. I'm getting out of here before the bandit feds turns up.

This Is What We Do On Weekends

This is basically a normal saturday for me.

Let's Play Guild Wars Part The Eighth: Blood For The Blood God, Delicious Candy For Evryone Else

So, in our last thrilling installment I learnt elementalisms and failed to save a chicken from the forces of darkness. Where do go from here?

Away, as it turns out. I'm running out of things I can do around here, so it's of to the other end of the map.

Not Pictures: The quick route

 So, what fantastic job opportunities await us here? Deliver a bear skin rug or whatever? Meh. Oooo, here's a good one: Quiz the locals on their political inclinations to make sure they're not a big bunch of traitors.

Of course. Because it's not like they'll just LIE or anything. Mind you, since those opposed to the current king are continually referred to as Royalists you'd forgive them being a little confused about the whole thing. I know I am. Might as well just forge the questionnaires and get on with something interesting.

Speaking of something interesting, I spy with my little eye something beginning with BREASTS.

Here we go again...

It funny the way clothing works around here. I always thought you basically started by covering up the sensitive and/or naughty parts and the worked out. But here it's like the opposite. Anything covered EXCEPT the "characteristics". Shame really, because that's almost a practical outfit. Just a shame about the holes in the chest. I mean, if it rains then the whole suits gonna fill up with water.

Anyway, in case you couldn't guess from the overly melodramatic name, she's a Necromancer too! We have so much in common. Obviously we should fuck now. Or, you know, not.

Turns out she has problems beyond sheltering her copious mammeries from the elements. There's some dodgy cultists who have done something to earn her disfavor. Can't remember what exactly, but it probably didn't involve looking her in the eye much. Anyway, she'll teach me some new Blood Magic if I agree to go slot them up. It's not Death Magic and it doesn't involve hideous minions, but I'll take whatever I can get. Plus I'd like to get out of here before I accidentally fall down her cleavage and suffocate. So it's back to the catacombs in search of these evil deviant blood cultists.

Let's see.... Are you blood cultists?

Nope. Gargoyles can't be cultists. That would be silly. They can however be murdered and raised up as twisted abominations of unlife. Which is always fun. However all good things come to end, and eventually the gargoyles run out, leading us on to....

This seems legit. Stop being a pussy.

Now this looks much more promising. I must say I do like the architectural vibe they have going on down here. It's all very cyclopean. Much nicer than all those sun drenched peasant hovels up on the surface. Kind of makes you wonder why more people don't move in. I mean apart from the giant scorpions, giant spiders, gargoyles, ghosts and skeletons.

No, I don't have a bone to pick with you. I have an axe.

Wait, Skeletons? SKELETONS!!! AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!

The cultists are skeletons! Wait, what? Blood cultists. Doing blood magic and stuff. Shouldn't they, I dunno, HAVE blood? Just a bit? Well, I suppose it's fairly irrelevant really as they're just going to die. Again. Only properly this time. I mean they WERE dead. And then they were undead. But soon they'll be DEAD dead. Or something.....

MINIONS!!!!

Kill this for me, I can't even be bothered to look at it.

So, what's next?

8 things Linkbait Generator has in common with Satan

I has a new toy.

Linkbait Generator is my new favorite thing™. Put simply, you give it a subject and will give you an alarmist, reactionary and/or controversial article title. And they are inevitably hilarious. Thus I intend to commit myself to begin actually writing these articles on a regular basis.

So the rules I will follow are as follows: at some point each week I will feed a subject into the generator. I will allow myself no more than 3 shots in the event of a creativity failure, but will try to stick to the first wherever possible. I will attempt to remain at least somewhat factual where possible, but reserve the right to generate absolute bullshit if I happen to find it funny. I will continue to do this, in addition to whatever else I happen to be writing about, for as long as I can actually be bothered.

So, without further ado here is the 8 things Linkbait Generator has in common with Satan

1. It is a prince of lies
2. It feeds on human suffering
3. It is actually incredibly rock and roll
4. It uses so called "SCIENCE " and "TECHNOLOGY" to undermine traditional values and scriptual teachings
5. It will try to corrupt you, take your soul, and use you to further its sinister plans
6. It is also possible that this has already happened
7. It dwells in a place of infinite suffering and lavicious perversity
8. It once ate a live baby on national television (citation needed).

 Oh yeah, this should be fun.