Wednesday 8 June 2011

Doomcrawl Dungeon Chapter 11: Smash

"You see, the thing about a Greater Deathhulk is, they're really built for sieges rather than hand to hand combat" Maris explained to the Skittering Rat-Thing that sat next to him on the edge of the pit. He wasn't quite sure where the Rat-Thing had come from. Presumably it had followed him down from the upper levels.

"I mean, sure, they can obliterate pretty much anything in a single punch, but they're a little slow."

A great crash echoed up from the depths of the pit, as if to punctuate this statement

"Gk kggkgkg gk" chittered the Rat-Thing in agreement.


"But, on the other hand, they're designed to withstand siege level defenses. You know, ballista, catapult, boiling oil..."

The Rat-Thing looked confused.

"Big rocks?" Maris tried.

The Rat-Thing nodded again. Apparently big rocks was a concept it could grasp.

"Right, so they're basically immune to any weapon you can actually carry."

Suddenly a bloodied hand appeared at the edge of the pit. Maris picked up a nearby rock and smashed the fingers with it, rather hard. There was a strangled cry, followed a moment later by a distant thud.

"So were you to somehow find yourself trapped in, say a pit, with a greater Deathhulk your options are rather limited."

Another rumbling crash echoed upwards, this time accompanied by a pained yell.

"No, I think he's still alive. Otherwise he wouldn't have made the noise. Anyway, since you're chances of wounding it are so low, it's more of a question of can you keep dodging it and find a way to escape before your fatigue enters equilibrium with the Deathhulks' slowness and you finally get reduced to a rather sweaty paste on the floor"

Maris gazed off into the distance, reflecting for a moment.

"Not the most dignified way to go, you have to admit. I really don't know what it is you living see in having organs."

"Gk" chittered the Rat-Thing

"Yeah, I suppose"

"Gk kg kkk ggkgkgkggk?"

"Oh, him? I dunno. For a laugh?"

There was a mighty yell from up in the pit. Had he been paying attention earlier Maris might have recognized it as the battle cry of Golric Icecarver, undefeated warlord, slayer of the Ice Wurm Cthandox, mightiest warrior of the Njordligist Barbarians. This was followed by another huge crash. This one was slightly different to those that came before, having a terrible.... Wet quality to it. Evidently Golric Icecarver would need some posthumous adjustment to his titles. Particularly the undefeated part.

"Oh, and he was doing so well." Maris stood and turned away from the pit.

"Well, I'm off. Good luck getting back to the upper levels alive and everything." He said to the Rat-Thing as he wandered off into the darkness.

The Rat-Thing looked around iteslf with a slowly dawning sense of terror, and quickly scuttled after the departing Deathmage

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