Dear diary, guess what I did today? What's that? Kill things in multiples of 10?
However did you guess? Slay the pumpkins, gather the farmers, battle the herbs and steal the warriors. Or something like that anyway.
But perhaps we should start at the beginning. After fleeing the last set of idiots who insisted on giving random and pointless things to do I find my way to the NEXT set of idiots who who insist on giving me random and pointless tasks to do. In order to punish a group of humans for living across the road I'm asked to go and kill their menfolk and steal their pumpkins.
Because nothing says vengeance like a lack of pumpkins.
Of course, all this is entirely futile. The human farmers have obviously found out about that whole not having to actually die if you don't feel like it thing, as they just keep coming back. Which is probably just as well, as considering how many of them there are and the fact that their farm is apparently only capable of sustaining a handful of pumpkins to eat the starvation and suicide rates are probably pretty high.
Speaking of which....
A high tower tucked away behind the farm and patrolled by a few guards with a deathwish.
Given that:
A - I am undead and thus immune to many things the living would consider fatal, and
B - Even if my body is destroyed somehow I can just pop back up after a quick jog on the astral plane, and
C - I am FUCKING BORED of killing these idiots and stealing their shoes
The logical conclusion is thus:
LOL. Well, seeing as how I'm a ghost now anyway...
WWWWHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE..........................
Well, that was easily the most fun I've had yet. After spending a pleasant time killing all the guards, running up to the top of the tower and then jumping off I guess it's probably time to report back in. After all, if I don't go and say that I killed 10 farmers no one will actually notice the difference. What with them coming back to life again a minute later and everything.
Still, that's the requisite number of farmers "killed" chief. What's next on the menu?
Yeah. He wants me to kill some of the soldiers. The soldiers guarding the tower. The tower I just spent the last hour jumping out of. And in the process killed about 50 of the goddamn things. Of course, trying to explain to my current idiot that I've already exceeded his quota is about as much use fighting a bunch of guys who just keep coming back to life. But what can you? After all I need the money. I mean, it's POSSIBLE that one day I'll find a shop with something I actually want to buy in it. Right?
Okay, probably not. But if it's a choice between aimlessly roaming the countryside in search of herbs and mathematically precise groups of wolves with rabbits feet who wear gloves and their sword wielding bat friends or standing around doing nothing then...
WWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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